the best is yet to come...

i woke up at my parents house today (after a semi unexpected sleepover-which is a story in itself!) but i woke up to the fresh smell of a morning summer rain, the sound of the rain pouring off the roof and thunder in the not-so-far distance!  in so many ways this morning reminded me of this same morning 7 years ago...but in other ways it was entirely different.  for starters, my parents live in a different house now - we live in the house they lived in 7 years ago!  but more importantly was the person laying next to me this morning. 

on this day, 7 years ago, i woke up listening to the rain pouring off the roof, laying next to one of my oldest friends, a friend so dear to me that i asked her to be my maid of honor because i just couldnt imagine any other person standing beside me on one of the most memorable days of my life.  little did i know...

on this day, 7 years ago, i got up and headed to the salon.  i spent my morning being pampered with hair and makeup...craving nothing more than a cheeseburger and a dr. pepper!  the joys in life, right? little did i know...

on this day, 7 years ago, i put on a beautiful white dress and some high healed shoes...i crawled into the backseat of a limo with my two best friends and two of my cousins.  we had our pictures taken 1000's of times - oh, the memories! but little did i know.....

on this day, 7 years ago, i married a very handsome, devoted and loving 22 year old guy.  surrounded by our friends and family, before the eyes of God we made a vow to love each other no matter what, to stick it through even in the darkest of days and to sacrafice and compromise as needed, to validate each others feelings and fulfill each others needs.  we made a vow to spend the rest of our lives together and to do whatever it took to make it work!  little did i know...

on this day, 7 years ago, when the party ended we headed back to a hotel. we slept in a king size bed and we packed our bags and headed to the bahamas the next day for 10 days in sunny paradise!  little did i know...

little did i know that, today i would look back on the past 7 years of my life with a smile and a happy heart.  i will be the first to say, it hasnt been easy. there have certainly been times i wasnt sure we would make it through, but one thing always kept us fighting for our marriage, God and the commitment we made on July 31, 2004. 

little did i know that i woould wake up today, in my parents house...with my amazing husband by my side, our baby girl in her crib just a few feet away, the sounds of little feet running down the hallway to see if we are awake and ready for breakfast yet. that i would start my morning with snuggles and cartoons with 3 of the cutest boys i have ever know, homemade pancakes and waffles, because at Nonna's house everyone gets what they want! that i would lounge around in my jammies until its time to leave and then we all head to the grocery store for a promised trip to the candy isle, where i teach our boys the value of money.  and that we would then pile back into our minivan and head home, to the place that frank has lived nearly all his life. 

little did i know that i put my babies down for a nap and enjoy the simplicity of a nice quiet shower.  that i would choose a black dress - its slimming and i did just have a baby less than 3 months ago!  i would do my own hair, my own makeup and slip my feet into some comfy flip flops. 

then i thank the babysitter (debbie, thank you again!) and head out the door with the one man who has continued to make my dreams realities for the past 7 years.  we grab a coffee at starbucks, we make a stop at target, holding hands as we walk through the store looking for the perfect pink dust ruffle for our baby girls crib!  then we head off to dinner, where we not only enjoyed an amazing meal, but we even more so enjoyed each others company.  we laughed, we talked, we smiled into each others eyes...the things we rarely find the time to do in the chaotic beauty of our everyday life!

we finished the night off, not with a dance, but with a hand in hand walk through the park before we head home for a competitive game of Wii family game night!!

had someone told me 7 years ago all the things we have experienced, all the adventures life has taken us on and where we would be on this very day - i would have laughed, i would have barely believed them.  but i can tell you there isnt a moment i would have changed.  the journey we have taken has brought us to where we are today and there is no other place i would rather be.  this is what life is all about...these are the memories we are making!

happy anniversary to the man who has stood by my side and helped make our life as amazing as it is.  i love you frank!

its a wonderful life...

today is my birthday...i am 28 years old and for once, my age is becoming hard to believe.  for so many years of my life, i lived in a way that was older than my age and in many ways, i guess i still am.  but for the first time, I'm finding it hard to believe that I'm actually this old!  i can only imagine what 30 is going to feel like!!

i have to say though, i feel so blessed.  many people like to measure their life's successes by very materialistic things, money in the bank, cars in the driveway, careers and travels and various other possessions.  for me though, my successes wake me up every morning, they tell me thousands of times a day how much they love me, they hug me and rub my back, they brush my hair, they make me laugh...my successes make me angry in ways i never knew, they make me cry just by looking in their cute little faces, they scare me in ways that spiders never could, they have given me life's greatest promotion...from Shannon, to Mommy!

i may have had the same job for 9 years, taken a step forward and then stepped back again...i may drive a car that is 7 years old, but its paid off...i have surrendered to a mini van, something i swore i would NEVER do, but it gets my precious cargo where it needs to be safely...i may live in a house thats been in our family for nearly 30 years, but its full of love and memories. 

so much of my life may have turned out differently than i would have planned, but i have someone very important to thank for that...God!  He has created more wealth in my life than any human ever could have.  I am eternally grateful for the ways He has taken over my life, changed my course of direction and taught me to slow down.  life is such a precious gift and my past 28 years have shown me so much.  i have loved and i have lost, i have been angry and i have forgiven, but even more importantly i have been forgiven!  i wasnt always the person i am today, i havent always turned to God in the good and the bad, but when i look back i know in my heart that He was always working in me.  I am who i am today because of who i was back then and although i know there are things i wish i could have changed, i live with no regrets.  I hold my chin high, proud of the woman, the mother, the wife, the daughter, the sister and friend that i am today.  love me or leave me, take me as i am and know that i will give back to you in the ways that you have given to me!  i am grateful, i am blessed.

so today i celebrate my 28th year, watching my husband - my best friend -  splash around in the kiddie pool with our beautiful little boys, with my baby girl on my lap.  i soak in the sun and plant their smiles and laughter in my memory forever.  i enjoy a wonderful meal at Mangia with my husband, our daughter and our wonderful neighbors. i will pick our boys up from VBS and listen to their hearts explode with love for Jesus on our way home. and to make the day even better, when i get home i will enjoy cake and cookies with my beautiful family of 6 and our God-sent neighbors and their beautiful twins daughters. 

i may never be a billionaire, but i know in my heart i am one of the richest women in the world and i couldnt ask for more!

Amazed...

life in general is pretty amazing, from the big events down to the small details, i am so grateful for all that i have!  today had its reasons to stand out though.  for one, Sicilya is already two months old - crazy as that may seem!!  and although i find it totally hard to believe, i also still have that comfort with her that makes me feel she has been in our life forever. bringing her home has been such an easy transition, almost too easy, and it just adds so much to how blessed we already feel!

the real tear jerker though, was this afternoon...for a few months now we have been trying to explain to tuscan what it means to be baptised.  we had chosen not to baptise our kids as babies because its something we really want them to understand and chose for themselves when they feel ready to have that sort of relationship with God.  so, as babies, we had them dedicated in front of our church and our family.  our hope since tuscan was a baby was that we would have raised him with enough belief and understanding that he would maybe make the choice before kindergarden.  but we are also open to the idea that it may take a little longer for him to fully understand.  so today, i pick him up from VBS and he is telling me about his day, the things he learned, the friends he made, etc.  out of nowhere he says "ya know mom, i really want to be dunked in that water soon so that i can have Jesus in my heart forever."  my eyes filled with tears, my heart filled with joy, it was a moment that i will never forget!  tuscan is such a passionate little boy and his love for Jesus is something he is so proud of.  having heard him speak those words, without any encouragement from anyone else just gave me that reassuring feeling that we really are doing something right as parents! 

before dinner tonight, we headed over with the neighbors to their grandma's house a few blocks away and jumped in her pool!  even Sicilya had on her bathsuit and swam around with me for a bit!  of course, i forgot my camera, so there arent any pictures this time!  but she LOVED it and she looked adorable (of course!!)  then we finished the night off in our backyard with a box of bakery fresh cupcakes!  one of the many advantages to making friends with the neighbors - their family owns the local bakery!!

so big, too fast!

not only can i say that 3 month clothes are starting to look exceptionally cute on Sicilya, because they actually fit but tonight we have reached a milestone!  during a brief moment of tummy time, after the boys were tucked into their beds and the dog was outside, while the livingroom floor was momentarily safe...Sicilya decided that tonight would be a great night to roll over!!

i was shocked!  for safety reasons, i cant say she gets much tummy time in this house!   so by no means was i excepting much more than some bobbing of the head when i laid her on her blankie tonight.  but i should have known... everything about this baby has come as a wonderful surprise!  after less than a minute, my little bundle of pure sweetness rolled from her belly onto her back with less effort than it usually takes me!  and just to be sure she knew what she was doing and it wasnt some sort of fluke, i laid her back on her belly and watched her do it again!!  then i called frank.  moments like that need to be shared right away, otherwise - im likely to forget.

and now she lays here, on the comfort of the boppy on my lap as i type.  a position i know she will all to quickly grow out of, an opportunity i need to take advantage of every moment that i can.  it was only (already) 5 years ago that my Tuscan was doing the exact same thing, and now hes nearly to big to even sit on my lap!  im trying so hard to hold on to as many moments as i can while Sicilya is little, i know all to well how quickly they go by and i dont want to just go through the motions, i want to make my minutes count, as many of them as i can anyway.  life is precious, my children are my world and i just want to be my best for them and their daddy. i am so blessed!

pretty and pierced!

the day started off with an early phone call from Nonna, asking if the kids and i would like to hang out for the afternoon - shopping, lunch, etc...well of course that was an offer that i would never turn down! 

as i was getting ready for the day, a thought came to mind - Nonna had been talking about how she hadn't bought much for Sicilya yet because she really didnt need anything, so i thought it might be sort of special if Nonna was the one to be with us when Sicilya got her ears pierced!!  Frank and i have been talking about it for a few weeks now, so i knew he would be ok with it and to me, it just seemed like a special mother/daughter/nonna type of thing to do!  of course, with the love and support of her 3 big brothers!!

so after a shopping trip to kohl's and lunch at Red Robin, we headed over to the mall.  Nonna was a wreck and ill admit, i was a bit nervous myself.  we let the boys decide on which earings she should get, tiny gold hearts with little pink stones in the centers!  sadly, there was only one girl working, so we had to do each ear, one at a time.  there was some crying - but just from Sicilya...Nonna and i managed to restrain ourselves from breaking down in front of the crowd that had formed!  but Sicilya did amazingly well!!  it was no different than her reaction to getting shots last week, she was sound asleep in my arms just moments later as we were walking back to the car!

im so glad we did it while she is so little...ive been able to clean them without any reaction from her and she just looks soooo beautiful!  or should i say, extra beautiful, because she certainly hadnt been lacking in the beauty department! 

i never called frank to tell him we did it, so when he got home from work it was super cute to see his reaction when he noticed!!  he was so excited, there may have actually been a slight tear in his eye!  and for me, it was like a right of passage - ive wanted a baby girl for as long as i can remember and what makes her more girly than pink and purple clothes?  getting her ears pierced of course!!  i know many others may not agree with our decision, but my ears were pierced when i was a baby, im just carrying out a tradition!

ps - Sicilya also experienced her first drive-in movie tonight...we took the boys to see Cars 2, with the girls from across the street and their mom...of course, she was a wonderful baby the whole night, all snuggled up with us!

4th of july...

there are so many reasons to love summer and in our family the month of july is a pretty fun one!!  we kick it off with a celebration of our independence and that is followed by 3 very important birthdays, for 3 consecutive weeks, my dad, myself and momma beth!!

this years celebrations may have been the beginning of a new tradition with the introduction of our newest family member!!  we went to two evening parades, followed by fireworks, two days in a row and it was awesome.  it really gave us that small town america feel, with some wonderful family time, laughs, smiles and memories!! 

the boys were mesmerized by the fireworks, although matteo was so tired he slept through them on the 4th!  Sicilya watched the whole show on the 3rd, never flinching with the loud noises but she also slept through them on the 4th (that night was the weaker of the two shows!)

my lil girl, snuggled up in the new sling!!

shall we call her lady liberty!!

and just one more reason to celebrate!!

bottle...check!

we have been putting it off and putting it off, but with my return to work creeping up on us quicker than i would like to admit, we knew it was time to get serious about introducing Sicilya to the baby bottle!  we learned a lot the hard way when Tuscan was a baby and we knew we never wanted to go through the same experience again! 

today was the big day!  with Sicilya having been so lethargic all day yesterday i was able to pump a few ounces into a bottle for her.  so this morning, i headed off to the grocery store by myself!! it was only the second time in 7 weeks that i have ever left the house without her and of course, she slept the whole time i was gone!  but we didnt let that stop us.  frank warmed up the bottle and fed her as i put the groceries away and she didnt even fight it, not even a little bit!  she didnt drink all that was in it (which was disappointing to have to dump the rest down the drain) but i am still so proud of her!  she drank enough to feel content and gave me so much peace about having to go back to work.  granted i still have 6 more weeks home with her, but we all know how quickly these summer days go by, my first day back will be here before we know it! 

I have every intention of taking it one day at a time, enjoying as many minutes with my 4 beautiful babes as i can sneak into a day and worrying about the rest when the time comes!  life is to short to live it any other way!

7 week check-up!

Today was a day for celebration and a day of sadness...Sicilya had a doctors appointment today, her 2 month well visit, even though she is only 7 weeks! 

 the great news is, she weighs 10lb 8oz (up 3lbs since birth and in the 65%), and she is 22.5 inches 'tall' (up 2 inches since birth and in the 75%).  she appears to be growing and developing wonderfully!! 

the sad part was, she needed 3 shots and an oral vaccination today.  she did so well with all 3 shots, crying just a few seconds with each poke, although the cry got a bit more intense as the poking continued!  we made it home, quiet the whole ride in the car and for the first hour or so we were home.  then my poor girl turned into a baby i baby i barely recognized.  she appeared to be in so much pain, although she wasnt feverish (yet).  she curled her quivering lip and cried in a way i have never heard her cry.  my heart was breaking for her!  needless to say, i spent 4 hours just holding her in my arms. she slept soundly on my chest, unless i moved the slightest bit, breathed on her the wrong way or got anywhere near touching her little thighs.  then the saddest cry i've ever heard would start all over again!

by dinner time i had to call out for help. i had no idea how i was going to cook anything, since she barely made it through my putting her down just so i could run to the bathroom.  i knew she wouldnt be ok with me strapping her in the carseat to run to the store for tylenol...so i called frank, who sent jerry over on his way home with infant tylenol and a little ceasars pizza!!  i was beyond grateful...he saved our night in so many ways!!

thankfully the tylenol kicked in quickly, Sicilya was finally comfortable enough to nurse - for the first time since we had gotten home and the boys and i all had food in our bellies!  i feared it was going to be a long night with her, but another dose of tylenol before bed and we all slept like babies - only after staying out in the backyard till 11:00pm with the neighbors, a bonfire and smores! but hey - thats what summer is for, right?

i am truly grateful for this life i have been given and i would not trade it for anything!!

locked and in love...

there was a moment in my day today that brought a tear to my eye...not a tear of sadness, but one of complete and utter joy!  for the first time today my baby girl really looked me in the eyes.  that in itself was more than special!  its so exciting to watch Sicilya grow.  She is really starting to fill out, clothes are starting to fit a whole lot better, which is making it that much more fun to dress her everyday!  I am beyond grateful for her extensive wardrobe because if she spits up on something or has a massive blow out, we just put something new on! 

but not only did she look me in the eye today, she held the gaze and smiled at me - more than once!!  it was amazing!  my heart completely melted in an instant.  the sparkle in her eye is enough to make me smile, but seeing her smile in response made it a moment to remember forever!

todays milestones: made eye contact and smiled at mommy!

just 6 weeks, or a lifetime already...

My dear sweet Sicilya, it is beyond amazing to me that you have already been a part of our life for 6 weeks...but at the same time i feel like you have been a part of us forever!  my heart has longed for a baby girl since i was a little girl myself, and now that you are actually a reality, i have a sense of peace in my life that i have never experienced before.  everything just feels right now, life has just fallen into place and i feel a greater sense of purpose! i honestly cannot think of anything else my life could possibly need.  you have truly completed this family in ways you yourself may never understand!  your brothers adore you, without doubt, you are their little princess!  and your daddy can barely talk about you without getting all choked up!  he looks into your beautiful little face and gets tears in his eyes almost every time!

Since your birth:

5/16 - we welomed you home, only after a quick stop at starbucks to let everyone know that "the baby" was actually a baby girl!!

5/17 - Great Grandma Janet came over and spent the day with us and to bring you your very own "grandma janet blankets".  seeing you in her arms made the bond i feel toward her just a bit stronger!  jess and jake stopped by for a visit and you were also tremendously spoiled with beautiful clothes, blanekts and jammies by our wonderful neighbors Andee, Jaycee, Carol and Bradley!  everyone is just so excited about your birth, you have been showered in so many beautiful gifts!

5/18 - you had your first doctors office visit today.  you weighed 6lb 10oz...a little less than they were hoping for, but ill take the blame for that - you are just patiently waiting for my milk to come in!  We also introduced you to Subway Dave today, your brothers would agree that is a pretty big deal - he gives them cookies if they eat their whole sub!  You made a quick appearance at your brothers preschool, where all the moms oohed and aaahed over you - i cant lie, i was loving every second of showing you off!  we made a quick stop at Nonna's office, where she so proudly showed you off to everyone working and you even met our other neighbors, Lee, Paul and Mr. Nichols.  after all the activity we happily ended the day with your first sponge bath!

5/20 - you had a follow up doctors appointment today, just to check your weight progress - thankfully you were up to 6lb 12oz, having gained 2oz in two days, the doctor seemed very pleased with that!  Nonna went with us (and your borthers) and then treated us to lunch at Chipotle!  not even a whole week old and you are having lunch at the family hotspot!

5/22 - you made your grand appearance at Fellowship where Nonna and Poppa proudly introduced you to all the people they have been sharing in their faith with, a church that we are starting to transition to. 

your cord also fell off today -although it looks a little sore, so i think we will wait a few more days to give you your first real bath!

5/23 - Tuscan graduated from preschool today and you were a very good girl during his ceremony!  then we headed to jess and jakes house for jazz's birthday dog party and dinner later that night.

5/27 - Today was your two week doctors appointment - you made it back to your birth weight (7lb 7oz) in just 13 days, one day sooner than the doctors were hoping for!  you also managed to pee on the scale again today - that makes 2 out of 3 times - silly girl!!  tonight also marks your first night out to dinner with mommy, your brothers, nonna and poppa at the Elma Town Grille, and you graciously slept through the whole meal!

5/29 - Today was a pretty important day, it was your first visit to Nonna and Poppa's house and we even spontaneously decided to spend the night!! you also made your grand appearance at our other church, The Vine, where many people were so excited to finally meet you.  our vine family have all watched your brothers grow in my belly and grow up in Christ, so it was pretty exciting to introduce our newest addition!

5/30 - Memorial Day parade in Marilla - turned out to be a flop of a parade, but it was still your first.  then we headed back to nonna and poppa's house and skyped with Uncle Dave, Aunt Enna and Nico!

6/1 - today was your due date...and i am so happy to have been able to hold you in my arms these last 2 weeks instead!

6/2 - Our dear and wonderful friend Jess came over tonight and did such a beautiful photo shoot with you!  I can not wait to see the final outcome.  you were so cooperative, giving us a chance to get so many precious photos of you.  its amazing to me that you are already two and a half weeks old!  slow down baby girl!  i was so glad that jess was able to come over tonight because you are starting to "unravel", you are losing your womb shape and stretching out a bit more everyday!

6/6 - Daddys week of vacation started today!  Finally we get to have him home with us everyday for a whole week!  we spent the whole day outside (mommy and daddy were spreading mulch in all the flower beds!)  when we finally finished we headed over to jerry and debbies house for a late backyard dinner!  its such a blessing to have such wonderful people in our life to share you and your brothers with!

6/7 - Today was your first trip to the zoo!!  we met the Schwab family there, you mananged to nurse while we were walking around the zoo and we stayed until the zookeepers were ready to lock the gates.  then we grabbed Chipotle for dinner and headed back to their house to eat and hang out for a bit!  crazy to think that in just about a year you will be running around with the rest of the kids.  i sure hope the time doesnt go by too quickly!

6/8 - tonight you accompanied mommy and daddy on our dinner date night to Mangia!  i'm not going to lie, it was pretty special having you out with us, dressed up in a pretty little outfit!  i just love you so much baby girl!!

6/9 and 6/10 - yardsale...you spent much of the day hanging out in your swing in the front yard, getting complimented on your beauty by so many of the yardsaling women that came by!  you and mommy also took a trip out to meet your newest cousins, Carson and Parker, who are just 6 days younger than you!!  although the 3 of you are nearly the same size, you are so much darker than them - it was like day and night...there is no doubt, with the color of your skin and your thick dark hair that you are a little italian princess!! 

6/11 - your very first roadtrip, at just 4 weeks old!!  we headed out to Cleveland today for an overnight, for Grandpa Frank's wedding!  you were wonderful in the car for the whole ride out and you were perfect all day!  you looked absolutely gorgeous in your little yellow and white dress and it was so wonderful  to be able to introduce you to so many members of our family.  you were able to meet not only Grandpa Frank and the new Grandma Kathy, but there was also Uncle Dave, Aunt Enna, Nico, Uncle Dom and Aunt Dana and all of Daddy's aunts and uncles!  i was happy to have stollen a few moments with you and Vincenzo out on the dance floor - it was a very precious moment!

6/12 - Cleveland zoo!! i dont know what it is about being at the zoo, but you nursed while we walked through much of this zoo too!  and then you slept the whole drive home from Cleveland!

6/17 - today i was able to introduce you to one of my oldest and greatest friends, Mandy!  she flew up from Florida to meet you and brought you your very first bathing suit!

6/18 - first Massino family experience - lil Mandi's surprise 8th birthday party!!  and our attempted trip out to the drive in, where the movie ended up being sold out!  thankfully you slept the whole drive there and back!

6/19 - Fathers Day!!  we spent the day at my Uncle Marty and Aunt Nancy's house, where we were able to finally introduce you to them and Grandpa Jim and mommy's cousins.  they also showered you in some adorable clothes and a blankie and bath towel!  its amazing how much you are loved little girl!!

6/23 - today we brought you to Thorpes Farms to go strawberry picking!!  although you cant taste the berries this year, it excites me to know that you will eventually be able to taste the jam from your first picking experience!! i look forward to the photo ops i should get when we take you again next year, with strawberry juice dripping off your chin!  oh, how i look forward to a lifetime of watching you grow up!

6/24 and 6/25 - yardsale at Nonna and Poppas house and another sleepover!! but the most special part of today, for me anyway, was taking a bubble bath with you.  holding your tiny body close to mine, in such a relaxing and intimate atmosphere, it was by far one of the most special moments i have ever shared with one of my babies!! 

6/26 - today was another day of meeting many family members for the first time.  we had a family bbq at jerry and debbies house...it was awesome to see all the babies "floating" around!!  and then you had a massive blow out on my lap and got more poop on my clothes than you did your own, but i guess thats just one of the many 'joys' of being a mommy!!

all in all, what i am trying to say baby girl, is that bringing you into our life has been such an easy transition.  you just fit right in, with no effort at all!  and because of that, it seems as though you have been a part of us for as long as there has been an "us".  you are so mild tempered and easy going.  you sleep when you need to sleep, you eat when you need to eat (and every feeding is followed by a good case of the hiccups, which makes you pretty mad!)  you are just an awesome baby and we couldnt be happier!  we love you even more than we would have imagined and everyday we wake up feeling more blessed than the day before! 

millions,

  ~  mommy